Releasing stress to prevent burnout and empathy fatigue: I recently facilitated a one hour introduction workshop to all the staff at Early Connections on how each of us can get to know our nervous systems and how best to nourish our core Self using body-based CFT (Compassion Focussed Therapy) strategies to move out of threat/stress/burnout… Continue reading Nourishing Self at Home and at Work
What if we can explore and access more of the guideposts to Wholehearted Living by getting to know our protective parts that get in the way of compassion, curiousity, connection, creativity, courage and compassion? Here is an IFS-informed experiential exploration of the Wholehearted Living Guideposts in Brene Brown's Gifts of Imperfection Book (10th Anniversary Edition).
Innocently immersing yourself in nature, you will discover in time that nature reflects your soul..."Bill Plotkin SoulCraft Wise Woman Within Retreat February 2022 in touch with nature, heart and soul! Healing Benefits of Nature: The healing benefits of nature are now being well researched and research findings are that "time in nature — as long… Continue reading The healing benefits of nature…
The Artist Way Journey. My well loved, well thumbed, well highlighted and post-it noted 1993 edition of The Artist Way by Julia Cameron I first completed the Artist Way by Julia Cameron in a small group of wise women in 2015 and it truly transformed my life! I had dabbled in being creative since school… Continue reading Rediscovering your creative (& spiritual) self
Betrayal and trust are a recurring theme in relationships even if the acts of betrayal occur in small ways, daily, creating a growing lack of emotional safety and connection. The Gottman research highlights that healthy couples respond to each other's bids for connection and use 5 positive statements to every negative statement even amidst conflict… Continue reading Repairing trust in your relationship
The anxiety dance refers to the negative spiral that can occur where a child is anxious (e.g. about going to school) so in desperation, as a parent, it is easy to keep your child home from school but the more this occurs the more the anxiety builds and it becomes harder and harder to overcome the anxiety.
In many ways our society puts long term relationships up on a pedestal without actually acknowledging the amount of hard work and commitment to change that often needs to happen for that relationship to stay healthy and for each partner to be thriving within that long term relationship.
I had someone ask me the other day ‘when did you start learning about mindfulness?’ And my answer was ‘Early 2011 when I started an MBSR course (Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction) with Nique Murch, an Openground Facilitator’.
But that question (like all good questions) got me thinking and really there have been a lot more twists and turns in my mindfulness journey, is it the same for you?
I’ll just write about a few key moments:
1. My Mum & Dad had an informal yoga group in our loungeroom, every Tuesday night (which I disliked as a kid!) but when I turned 15 I was allowed to join in – I had a love/ hate relationship with yoga / breathing meditation at that age – at times I felt more relaxed, at other times I felt pressure to do it the right way and I was all tense!
2. The next key time was at Uni, feeling homesick & in hindsight, depressed – I found a flier advertising a meditation group- I don’t think I would have gone to it, except for the fact that I’d seen Mum & Dad meditate, so it must be OK to give it a go and I was keen to try anything to sleep better and be a bit more relaxed in the day! I wish I could remember the group leader’s name as she had a profound impact on me, each week she would introduce us to a new meditation technique, often using visualisation strategies – some I still use today!
3. A few years later I was invited to join some ‘way out there’ women in Kununurra WA for a meditation evening once a week – they introduced me to reiki, past life regression, and lots of passing healers or meditation teachers who wanted to share their techniques! My favourite thing to do was find a beautiful large red rock by a waterfall and meditate!
4. When I became pregnant with my first child (and every child after) – I was so lucky to be able to do pregnancy yoga – which involved a lot of relaxation, meditation & visualisation exercises and afterwards I did Mums & Bubs Yoga – I am sure Julia, my yoga teacher, was one of the main influences why I just had to have a 3rd pregnancy / baby! (And boy did I need some relaxation with twins!!) The thing that kept me sane in each new born baby phase was to put on a yoga nidra cd (body scan) every afternoon, and every afternoon I would fall asleep – but wake up at the end of the cd & feel refreshed ready to go again for the afternoon! Having used the same cd when I was pregnant it felt like every time I put it on, the baby would sleep / be really calm too!
At this time a parenting counsellor shared with me that if I could focus in on just one thing for one child – they would feel content and I could slow down too and enjoy they moment! I learnt to relish baby toes / smiles or a giggle & a laugh or doing a craft activity.
5. As kids grew and life got busier I remember not doing the yoga nidra cd so much – and then one day I walked into an old church in Ross Tasmania, and just found tears welling in my eyes at the solid peaceful silence from 200 years of silent contemplation. I then knew I had to bring more meditation & spirituality back into my life and began meditating every afternoon when my kids napped or had quiet time!
6. Again kids grew older, and I started work – it was hard to do a lunchtime meditation although sometimes I could manage it – the stress was getting to me when Sarah Napthali’s Buddhism For Mothers Of School Age Children – saved me – and then her pocket book Buddhism For Busy Parents became my daily go to for a paragraph of how to live mindfully.
7. At the start of 2011, I was aware of how much of my beautiful, peaceful holiday I had spent habitually worrying, planning, even when there was nothing to worry or plan about! Luckily I just passed a noticeboard one day to see the MBSR course advertised – perfect timing! This course transformed my life as we committed to 45 minutes daily mindfulness practice over 8 weeks- and a whole day silent retreat and I could really feel the difference – my whole outlook on life had changed and I began to change how I was with other people, especially my kids!
8. In 2012 I was trained as a facilitator in Bringing Up Great Kids & Positive Discipline & both emphasised Dan Siegels work in how it was important to teach parents about how children & adults brains worked & how there were mindfulness strategies children & adults could use to calm down. I have been teaching this to parents in Alice Springs & now Port Macquarie ever since as well as whenever I remember using the strategies at home.
And so the journey continues, I still say to everyone, I am a practicing student of mindfulness because I don’t think you ever reach the stage where you are mindful all the time or have stopped learning!! I am lucky now to have a peaceful verandah, overlooking gum trees, to mediate on in the mornings, out of earshot of the kids for a bit and I hate starting the day without it! I’m heading out on retreat again in September to Alice Springs (can’t wait!) and I love listening to podcasts to continue my learning – my favourites at the moment are Jack Kornfield & Tara Brach.
So I’m keen to hear, what is your mindfulness journey? What would you like your mindfulness journey to be from this day forth – because mindfulness is always about starting afresh with right now!
I had someone ask me the other day ‘when did you start learning about mindfulness?’ And my answer was ‘Early 2011 when I started an MBSR course (Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction) with Nique Murch, an Openground Facilitator’.
But that question (like all good questions) got me thinking and really there have been a lot more twists and turns in my mindfulness journey, is it the same for you?
I’ll just write about a few key moments:
My Mum & Dad had an informal yoga group in our loungeroom, every Tuesday night (which I disliked as a kid!) but when I turned 15 I was allowed to join in – I had a love/ hate relationship with yoga / breathing meditation at that age – at times I felt more relaxed, at other times I felt pressure to do it the right way and I was all tense!
Deep Heart Wisdom 